Thursday, November 10, 2011

The meeting

My son was so nervous that he kept me awake, so I had only 2 hours of sleep.
And because I had caught a cold and a throat infection was the result I didn't sleep well during those few hours.

I was surprised I felt rather OK when we went on our way.

The woman who had handled his case was exactly as I pictured her when I had her on the phone.
Let's say it was quite a meeting.
She jumped on the fact that my son did some simple work for the paper and she said that it was clear he was able to work.
Well, there's no one willing to pay for that.
It took quite a while and quite some emotions to make her clear that I had no objection to my son being paid for the few hours a week he's doing some utterly simple volunteer work, but that she's very naieve to think someone will pay for it.

She came with the example of a person not able to communicate to put him in a secluded area underneath an office building when he could work in silence, with lots of special care.
I asked her what the benefit is of spending a lot of money in making someone do something and feel lonely, instead of respecting disabilities and inabilities.
I also explained that forcing him to work would mean making me spend about 7 hours a day motivating him and helping him to free himself from the stress for his effective working time with special support and the whole lot of about two hours. That I wanted to be paid for all the invested hours for their wishes. Like I have to go with him each time there's a meeting or anything else where his presence is required.

Ofcourse she said it doesn't work like that.
I said that I was doing far more than she did, and she was the one getting the paycheck each month and a good pension in the end.
I'm getting nothing, haven't been properly on vacation for over 25 years and I won't get a pension at all.

I don't think she understood anything of it.
"I know an autistic person who...."was her line. And she tried to imply that I didn't want him to work.
My reaction was very clear: I like him to be away so I could have some time without stress and I like more money to circle in the family.

We went after she gave him one year extra to find his way in life.
Then this al starts over again.

Just because some didn't want to listen to what the psychiatrist of our son had to say.


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