Thursday, September 30, 2010

Jaw surgery

Today I went for small jaw surgery. I had to have an implant to enable me to chew properly.
I'm lucky that my own dentist is able to do this kind of surgery too

Yesterday evening I had to desinfect my mouth with special stuff.
I was careful for some reason and diluted it with a lot of water.
Great decision, as I had an allergic reaction to the stuff..
No problem, I can deal with that.
But I felt glad I'd been so carefull.

Before going this morning I had to take a boost of antibiotics.
Never had so much in one time.
Added to it a proper painkiller.

At the practice in the surgery room I had local anesthesia and a scan of my jaws was made.

He then came in and told me that he couldn't go forward with the procedure as planned, because the bone was not dense enough yet. A while ago he tried to extract a molar which was grown together with the bone and
the bone clearly needed more time to heal.

But... he could do the implant at the other side.
We discussed this two years ago and then he told me it was impossible, but new techniques have been developed and now he could do it.

He went forward with the procedure and I left with no feeling in my jaw whatsoever, as two sides had loads of anesthesia in it.

At home I fell asleep on the couch and woke up just in time for the next dosage of antibiotics.

It turned out later that the dentist had tried to phone me to ask how I was doing.
Isn't that nice?
But my phone doesn't work anymore and right at this moment we need the money for other things, so I had to let him know by other means that I was doing fine.

I look like I've been in a fight, with a thick jaw like on those old picures of someone with toothache.
But that'll pass.
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Wednesday, September 29, 2010

The Continuing Story: toes and meeting

Today we had a meeting at the daycare for our autistic son.

He was very nervous about it and it wasn't fun to deal with him.
He cares about how other people think about him, but only when it's too late.

He had ingrown toenails and couldn't attend.
I had the idea he used it as an excuse not to go and the way he behaved today made it clear I'd been right.
He was afraid he would be told he'd loose his disability benefit. He forgot that the people who deal with him know people like him.

I had to tell him I'd cancell and he would be nervous much longer that way, then he gave in and went with us.

The meeting was very positive.
They told him that the times he'd been there he had made a good impression.
And thye valued his calls and mails to tell them he couldn't come. (So I did well to motivate him to do so.)

We agreed he'll only call now when he's ready to go there. That'll be about one or two weeks from now, as he's going to get surgical treatment of one of the toes.

They're very kind there, so I hope all will be well.
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Tuesday, September 28, 2010

student exchange - sponsors needed

The school of the girls participates in a student exchange.
That means that both girls have the opportunity to visit another country during 10 to 12 days.

We won't know which country until before the end of the year, because they're going to match groups on different criteria. For instance size.

The exchange is subsidised by the European Union, which means it's not a vacation, but a real learning experience. Tests included.

The students (pupils) have to organise part of their money themselves.
We're looking into those possibilities now.
Ofcourse selling old toys and old clothes are part of the idea, as is making christmmascards and maybe jewelry and staging a performance of theatre and ballet.

But as we have two girls going there it means also two sets of traveling gear.

So we're looking for sponsors.
Please help us out.
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Monday, September 27, 2010

Parent's evenings

My agenda has never been as full as it is this month.
After the non-vacation one can either see it as a burden, or just consider it a lucky event. No way I can sit bored at home, trying to find out what to do next.
As if that ever happens!!

For all children we have meetings this week.
Most of them at school.
Most of them at the same evening.

We're lucky that the extra evening for one of the girls is about the same as one for the other girl, so that's solved.
One of the boys goes to a school we already know. I know what they're going to tell the first evening, I know the computer program they're using, and I've met the man in charge a while ago.

So that leaves us with tonight and wednesday.

It's raining cats and dogs, I have to go by bus. So that means waiting about half an hour to get back... knwoing there is someone going this way, lives only one street further, but who has a cleaning obsession. So she won't ask me to go with her by car.
Pity.
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Sunday, September 26, 2010

Afternoon in the shopping centre

Today the shopping centre was open.
That's not happining often so we thought it would be nice to go there.
In the paper special events were announced and one of the leading singers of the country would be present, so that sounded like a huge event.

First impression was that it was very crowded. But most people were looking, not buying.

We had made a small list of things we really needed, so we went to a few shops and enjoyed the music.

The event which should have/had attracted to many people was not as impressive as we thought when reading the paper.

There were some make-up stands, and even make up shows on a podium, announced by a lady who certainly was not the famous singer, and when I saw her she certainly was not even her look-alike. I don't think she was using those good products she tried to sell, or maybe they just don't work. :)

I collect teaspoons and I saw very nice ones with letters for a nice prize.
Alas the guy who was supposed to seel them was completely caught up in a conversation. I could have taken the whole lot and he wouldn't even have realised.
We went upstairs to his shop and bought a spoon with the bridge of town. Never bought a spoon of my own town.
We kindly told her that the stand was rather unwatched. When we passed it later her mom was standing there. Smiling ans saying "thanks".

At home we had coffee and I had a closed look at the wintercoats.
The temperature will go down this week and the girls have to bicycle enough to get cold without a warm coat.
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Saturday, September 25, 2010

Just Like Me



1. Who in your life do you think behaves and thinks the most like you do?

Hmm.. can't think of anyone but one of my daughters.

2. As a kid, were you ever wrongly accused (and punished, if it went that far) for something you didn't do? If so, what was it? What happened?

Often. But I don't want to go back and dig all those experiences out of the past.
It was long ago and that's over and sone with.

3. What about as an adult, were you ever wrongly accused for something you didn't do?? Do you think it's worse to be accused as a child or an adult? Why/why not?


Yes, I've been accused of abusing my children and I've never ever done that.
I don't know if that's worse than being a child, because those are different worlds and different ways of experiencing it.
I do know that I felt lousy because people were able to think that about me. I've never done anything worse than killing flies, sliders and musquitos.

3. What’s the scariest weather situation you’ve experienced?

I was at sea during a storm, but I liked it.
I started to feel afraid when I had children.
Well, not really afaird, more aware of the risks.

I ran to prevent injuries to myself about a month ago when we had hurricane like situations here.

4. If you could wake up tomorrow morning in another country, where would you want to be and why?

Haha...anyone knows by now: scotland or anywhere else in the UK near the hills or near the sea/lake/ocean.
I want to be closer to nature, in the country where I feel I should be.
This country is the country of my youth. It has changed so much that I don't feel happy here anymore.

5. Instead of going to work Monday, if you could spend the entire day doing something else--any one or two things that you absolutely love doing--what would you do?

I would love to spend my day with a good friend, maybe just hanging on the couch and watching Star Treck with cinnamon tea.

6. What sites (other than meme sites) do you use most to help you post on your blog?


None. I mainly blog from my own experience, but I need to have some posts to get rid of the bills of the lawyer. Sorry you have to go through these posts.

7. Check out a post on your blog from six months ago (March 2010) and tell us what is different now about your blog and/or life?

I was happy then.

8. What was the last photograph you took?
Can´t remember when I took one myself.
I had my son take one from the mushrooms at the side of the road yesterday.

9. Which fashion trend do you believe is the most horrendous and why?
Everything black and the other is± jeans which have holes in them.

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Friday, September 24, 2010

Chicken and resistent bacteria

The dangers of what we eat are sometimes worrying me.
Today the first person died after eating chicken contaminated with ESBL bacteria.

ESBL stands for Extended Spectrum Beta-lactamase. It's a name for a collection of enzymes which bacteria create to protect themselves against antibiotics of the third generation.

These antibiotics are used in hospitals against infections which can't be treated otherwise. They're the last resort and more often than ever they're failing.

Today, at a conference in Leiden, it was told that the amount of hospital patients with resistant bacteria has been grown with 50% over the last two years.
Outside the hospitals the amount has tripled!!!

That meams that eating chicken meat poses a real danger to the lives of people.
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Solid oak flooring

One of my best friends is a midwife. 40 years now, so she has been at the beginning of many lifes.
She runs her own private practice and decided the past months to make some major changes.
She decided to share the practice not with two, but with three midwifes, so she can take more time for herself. And she decided to redecorate the whole practice.

We went for furniture last week and bought modern office furniture and today we went for flooring.
She wants the whole practice and entrance redone with one kind of flooring, so it should be one and the same material, able to deal with heavy traffic, as the entrenace is shared with a dentist and a lawyer.

The choice was not difficult: hardwood flooring.
Because the building has a very traditional, kind of victiorian look we thought Solid Oak Flooring would be the best choice.

Easy Step Flooring looks very sophisticated and is best quality.
Because it's possible to buy direct from the manufacturer the price is very reasonable, especially as the practice is very spatious and a lot of square metres are needed.
Added to it is the convenience of the best flooring installation services.
We've often seen that people who saved money on that had to deal with problems with the change of seasons. Either a raised or a dimished humidity and/or temperature caused serious problems due to bad installation and my friend can't permit that kind of disaster as she runs a very busy practice.

One of the other items of consideration was the time she needed to close the practice to have the work done.
As she could order online and opt for next day delivery and installation she could move forward fast with the redecoration.
The requirements for installation of a wooden floor are on the site, so all we needed to do is see if the place fullfilled the requirements. And ofcourse it did.

Ofcourse it's a good feeling that there's a 5 year warranty on the floor.
With such a good manufacturer and fitters no problems are expected, but one never knows.

We talked about ordering some free samples, which can easily done from the site, but it's not really necessary, as one of her collegues has the same flooring.

Easy Step Flooring is not only wonderful to walk on, but also to deal with.
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the last beautiful day of the summer in autumn?

It was announced as the last beautiful day of the summer in autumn.
I guess it gave a very familiar feeling, resembling the summervacation, because we nearly overslept.
My alarm didn't sound and everyone kept sleeping confortable curled up in bed, until one of the other alarms pierced through the house.
None of us had heard the noisy neighbour slam the door on his way to his work, none of us heard his wife do the same.

This happens twice every schoolyear, either at a morning like this, when the weather is perfect, or at one of those gloomy grey rainy mornings when everyone wants to stay in bed and the unconscious dictates the conscious to stay asleep.

Routine paid off though.
All the kids were ready just in time, had a good breakfast and arrived at school in time.

In ther afternoon I took my autistic son to the podotherapist. He has ingrown toenails which need professional care. (See here the limits of my parenthood. :))
I could manage until he hurt his feet against something tearing up the nail. It grew back downwards. Ugh.

Next week he needs part of the nail taken off.
He took it all very quietly. Strange eyes do wonders.

I managed to get some rays of sun, get part of the laundry dry outside and ate some brambles from the bushes in the garden.

In the evening we were surprised by very bad weather. But that's a story for another time.
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Thursday, September 23, 2010

Supermarkets

I'm kind of annoyed with the changes the supermarkets make every so many months.

Because I needed s few groceries I went for a quick visit and walked almost blind to the right shelves to get....

WRONG!!

They had changed the whole line of shelves.
No spaghetti, but dog food!!

The boys who were supposed to fill the shelves were all helping out people who couldn't find things.
I was lucky to see a friend of one of the boys and he saw me.
He walked all the way with me to get the whole list of groceries in as little time as possible.

I owe him!
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Wednesday, September 22, 2010

The pharmacy... again!

Just the other day I wrote about mistakes of the pharmacy here.
Today I got my new bag of meds and had a very close look at everything.

This time I got all sorts of packages in all sorts of languages, ranging from Dutch and English to Spanish.
Tell me why I have to deal with spanish meds when they're made about 45 km from here?
After some bad experiences with greek meds I don't believe anymore that they're transported under strictly controled conditions. They contained the same, so I shouln't have experienced a difference.

This time they gave the wrong amount and dosage of a certain medication.
Instead of 120 mg it's 180. And instead of 90 tablets I got 25 of them.

I can't have ordered them in that amount as I take them every day, and none of the meds come in 25 pieces.

So back to the pharmacy.
No, they couldn't take them back. So we have to pay them anyway.
No, it was not their mistake and they couldn't reach the doc.

Back home on the phone.
Explaining the whole lot to the secretary.
Luckily I got the right one, who works there for over 15 years now.
But even to her I had to explain everything. "You can see I take them already so many years every day, that I know what I'm taking now. And I've got the mail so I can proof I've sent out the right order."

So she's sending a fax to the pharmacy and someone is going there to get the meds.

So that's a lot of effort for just a few pills. Time that could have been used in a far more pleasant way.
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Buildings

Trying to take my mind of things I landed on a game called Social City.
It's on FB, a social network site.

The first levels are easy and one goes through them fast.
The next levels require some strategical thinking.

Buying a building with the coins of the game it's more worthwhile than buying land.
So like in real life one should make money work for you, instead of work for the money.
Buildings deliver levelpoint and gamecoins.
And one has factories which makes those coins and points too but not on a click. By making a clever choice to balance time and money one can make the factories work overnight and buy new buildings in the morning.

Apart from tudor houses and castle elements, there are family houses, office buildingsand even a steel building or twenty.
When one has plenty of friends one received and gives pieces of road and other elements that make your city looks real.

I like building a city, while networking and writing a text.

Multitasking can be fun.
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Money... ugh!

Yesterday was a special day here in The Netherlands.
The Queen opened the governmental year with a ride in the golden cage through the city of The Hague and with reading the plans of the government for the next year.

There was not much to read, as we still have no new government and the former one can only decide on a minimal amount of subjects.

One thing however caught my attention and it certainly didn't make me happy.
We need to pay 100 euro more for health insurance, and kids above 18 are no longer insured automatically for the dentist.

Put that together with the unpleasant surprise that yesterday we needed to pay almost 75 euro for the medication of our autistic son and part of the headache of this morning is explained.

It was also said that the income of us won't rise next year, so we will be confronted with financial problems unless something good happens.

It makes our plans to move more intense.

Right now we want to live closer to nature and we want to try to grow our own fruit and vegetables.
I've tried here and was very successfull in the past.
The last years however growing crops has been almost impossible, due to the weather and the ground conditions,
When we're still here next year I might use containers to grow crops. Maybe that's better than in the garden earth. After they've raised the ground water level gardening is less fun and crops don't like it anymore.
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Electronics

The past years I've seen so many times that small children have more computerskills than grown ups, that I wasn't surprised to hear the daughter of a friend talk about electronics.

Her father takes her with her when he goes to work whenever it's possible, so she sees and hears a lot. He's a technician and he volunteers to help elderly with their TV's and other electronical equipment.

So when we discussed a new TV we suddenly heard a young voice saying that a new TV should be bought online as buy.com has some very good ones on offer.
Her development is not overall at the same level though, because when we had a good laugh she didn't understand and went away to play with her dolls.
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vacation relaxation syndrome

This mroning I woke up with the memory of having a headache in my sleep and with the reality of a splitting headache.

I'm not amazed.

Yesterday the teamleader of the supervisors let us know that she won't send them before the complaint has been taken care of.
So that stress immediately disappeared, No need to be on my guard for strange questions or whatever.
Added to that the concellation of a meeting that would have been of utmost importance and there were finally one and half day of relaxation ahead.

With the best weather that can be expected this time of year.

So I became the victim of vacation relaxation syndrome.

Isn't it a pity?
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Tuesday, September 21, 2010

Wedding cake toppers

When we were in town last week we saw a few wedding cake toppers which didn't appeal to me.
You know those standard female and male figures which are too boring to see, let alone stand with pride on a wedding cake.
Mine are somewhere far back in a drawer.
I'll find them when we move.

That afternoon I wondered if none had the idea to make custom wedding cake toppers. Either almost real look-alikes or carucatures with large faces and small
bodies. Or ones with fancy clothes or the colours of the sport team.

I'm very happy for those couples who have already found out there is someone who makes custom toppers. And more. You only have to send a photo and make a few choices, like chosing the bodystyle.

The toppers are not limited to images of the bride and groom. The family dog and other figures can be created too, which openes a whole new range of party cakes.
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Wrong medication!

I wondered why I didn't stay on top of the investigation that went on about two moneths ago.
I thought it was stress and the unusual situation that made me feel so very tired.

Wrong!

Today I found out I got the wrong medication for my metabolic disease, so my body couldn't get rid of the toxins.
You can compare it with a kidney disease patient who needs to be on dialysis three times a week to clear the blood.
But I'm more lucky as I can deal with the problem with a bit of care for what I eat and a tablet each evening. This enables some body enzymes to be activated well enough to clear away the toxins.

But when someone doesn't give me 50 mgs, but only 0,5 mgs...
Well, you can fill that in yourself.

I could trace the prescription back to me asking for 50 mgs.
But I can't see what happened between the doc and the pharmacy.

All I know is that I always check my meds, but that time I didn't. I was too busy with other more important things that a minor chance of getting the wrong meds.
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Traditions: sending cards

In The Netherlands we have a very rich tradition of sending cards.

When a baby is born the announcement is made with a card. Only direct family and best friends are informed in person or with a phonecall.

The card mentions date of birth, birthweightm name of parents and siblings, and ofcourse the full name.
When children will be baptised the date and place is mentioned too.

Cards like these are collected by many.

Last week an american friend told me about their tradition of sending 1st birthday invitations.
Parties are much larger in her country than in ours.
In most cases we limit the party to family and close friends. And sometimes we invite the women who participated in the same group of pregnancy gymnastics.
So sendings cards for a first birthday isn't done here.

Main festivities to send cards are weddings, weddinganniversaries, but only when a party is involved, and when someone has died.

I've collecetd quite some birthcards, and you?
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Monday, September 20, 2010

Autism and the main post office

Going to the post office has always been very frightening to him.

In a way I can understand it.
It's huge!!

With so many desks it's impossible to plan ahead where to go.

Even people without autism have problems taking it all in.

There's no plan behind the way the furniture is put there. Unlike the old post office where everything has a fixed place and one desk was completely similar to the other one. Except for the smiles of the persons behind them.

I bet my son would have like the old post office.
It was rather dark, no mirrors or sudden patches of light. Just easy on the eyes.

People didn't talk a lot there. They walked calmly to where they wanted to be and almost whispered to each other.
Here kids are running around in the bright light, people speak loud, phones are ringing, etc etc.

Too many distractions for my son.
And I haven't even written about the posters, the floor and many more things that catch his attention and make him feel overwhelmed.

So when we'll visit there he won't be able to do what he came for.

So let's go to the neighbourhood office and teach him what to do there.
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Responsibilities of car-owners

Changing rules and regulations in the USA make people feel uneasy.
Whereas in fact the requirements on car-owners are very reasonable.
Since august 2010 in the states, except New Hampshire car-owners should proof they can pay the cost for car damage and health injuries.

Here we've got a car insurance and legal repsonsibiliy insurance, and ofcourse health insurance. So everything is covered.
Added to that all cars should be seen for a professional check each year and one needs to get the repairs done because one needs to have a recent certificate to drive.
So owning a car here comes with lots of legal responsibilities.

In the USA people have the choice between cheap auto insurance companies and those which cost a lot of money.
So one needs a realistic view to know which costs one wants to be covered.

Especially young people make mistakes in the choice.
They overestimate their driving skills, which results in minor damage. But a couple of times a bit of damage adds up to real problems.
So they have to be very aware that young people will have more costs to deal with than older people.

So making the best choice is of utmost importance.

Well, it reflects the responsibility the governments wants. :)
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We're bugged: alarm about beatles

It's a long time ago that scientists realised that with the foreign fruits and vegetables the socalled healthy imports also contained foreight animals and insects.
Much is written about snakes and other larger animals, but now the insects are in the news.

All sorts of beatles enter our country without people even seeing them.
Some eat grains and other products which were intended for human consumption.
Others like our gardenplanst like rhodondenderon and ivy.

It's discovered that far too many are in our country now and they're moving fast from the large airports (in the west) to the east. Destroying a lot of plants on their way.
Consider the fact that each and every one of thse tiny animals can create an offspring of 1200 and you'll understand scientist don't feel happy.

Crushing them under your feet isn't a real option.
You have to crush them all, otherwise one of those 1200 first offspring will create 1200 others and so on and so on, and they're not easy to crush. They're quite firm.

The problem is not a national one, but a European and even international one.
Products have to be checked far better.
They need to be clean, whether they arrive in airports, harbours or over land.
How they can be checked best and how much that's going to cost?

We'll first have to pay those scientists to research the matter.
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Compression stockings

One of the consequences of getting a bit older is dealing with some ailments and other problems which we certainly don't like.

I think I'm the lucky one, but the father of the children has to deal with quite some discomforts the past time.

A year ago he had knee surgery.
Apart from the days lost, as he felt it, because he couldn't go to work, he had to put on compression stockings every morning. That's not easy when your back is not very soupple.
He got a handy device to help him out, but still. It's extra time in the morning and it caused quite some discomfort, even though it must have helped against lymphedema very good.

Many people wear compression stockings. Far more than I thought.
So when he stopped wearing them, I washed them and put them aside in case someone needs them.
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Sunday, September 19, 2010

Don't Let the Sun Catch You Crying



1. When was the last time you cried?

Last week.

2. If you could wake up tomorrow with a new talent, what would it be?

Hmm... Don't know.
Sailing?

3. Who is someone (other than yourself) would you like to go back into your past and talk to and why?

I would like to go back to Hans and ask him if he's happy and what I can do to make life better for him..

4. What is your favorite meal eating out?

Wok. I ate that the last time with a friend and it was go-o-ood!

5. Do you feel energized or drained by being in a group situation? If the answer is "it depends," on what does it depend?

Energized, most of the time. I'm OK being alone, but I'm also fine with a group.

6. What word do you use far too frequently?

I don't have a special word that I frequently use.

7. What’s a word you’ve invented? (alternate question: What needs a word but doesn’t have one yet?)

It's a word that can't be translated in english.
It's kind of screamology.

8. Pick out one of your favorite songs. Go to Song Facts and tell us about the song's history.

We'll meet again from Vera Lynn. I'm not looking up the history because everyone knows the son.

9. What is your absolute favorite piece of furniture you have and why?

My bed.
I can hang everything on it.

Want to take part too?
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Logo made by me with tubes from Outlaw by Design.
You can request the logo, but only when you'll credit properly.
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Saturday, September 18, 2010

The coat

We went to town today because on of the girls wanted a wintercoat.
I wasn't very motivated to go from one shop to another, but I valued the fact that she went in time this year, and not at a moment that the winter season is going on for quite a while already and the coats are far too expensive.

Most coats we saw were more autumn coats. Nice, but not warm enough for the strong winds that she catches when she's crossing the high bridge to school.

Then she went inside a shop that is far too warm for me. I don't like it there, because the high temperature makes the plastics smell ugly.

Instead I went to one of the market shops and found a very nice coat.
Right colour, warm.
When she came to look she was rather hesitant to try it out, but she did.
That coat was made for her.


Big smile...wallet... you know the drill.

At home I had a look at all the labels.
Turned out the coat was from a good designer and had cost initially 200 euro's. Wow!
We sure didn't pay that!!
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Filters

In the middle of the night the electricity shut down.
As one of the kids had been in the kitchen I supposed the problem would be there, so after having a look with a handheld light and not finding any clear problem I put the switch to it's right position and we had electricity again.

I asked him which light he had used, and he told me it waqs the light above the furnace.
It's a small light an most of us prefer it above the clear, bright kitchen light.

While I checked on the lamp, which was down, I saw the filter needed replacement too.
It always nicely keeps up with the lifespan of the lamp, so I was perfectly OK with that.

After changing the bulb, I went to bed.

Filters in the house need to be checked at regular intervals.

Like spa filters for instance.
Always use the right equipment and follow instructions carefully. It will prolong the life of your filter.
Buy it at a trusted place, so you'll have the best.
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Friday, September 17, 2010

The new psychiatrist

Today my third son and I went to a new psychiatrist.
When he reached the age of 18 he should have switched psychiatrists, as the centre he visited is for kids and young people until 18. But he got the chance to stay a bit more because his brother was not yet 18 and it would be best to move over all at once.

We had a long talk and I told him that I had some disagreement with the former psychiatrist about the diagnosis.
I just told what happened and his reactions were the same as mine.

Then he asked my son a load of questions and the result was:
ADHD with dyslexia. No autism, and certainly nothing schizoid of schizofrene.

So I'm a mom now of three autists.

That's good now we're under supervision.
The situation has changed, so that means, very, very strictly speaking, that we can ask the supervisors to ask a judge to review the case.
(That's soon for them to lose their job. LOL! so I don't think they'll do that.)



autism
A series of posts
about lack of knowledge,
lack of concensus between disciplines
and the need for a formal diagnosis
with a psychiatric label
to get support for a unique individual
with autism.


.
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Fitness and my friend

One of my friends loves to fitness.
She visits a fitnesscentre in one of the villages nearby, because they have the equipment she likes best.

I've never been a fan of fitness.
As a former balletdancer I like to feel free to move and I'm not a person to work for more muscle strength. More one to work for souplesse and swift movements.

My friend however feels completely happy when running on a band and at the
pull up bar.
Whenever I see her after working out she looks much younger and energetic, and I can also observe that she is more patient with her children.

As shen eeds quite some time to go to the fitnesscentre I've asked her why she didn't buy some small fitness equipment for at home. They've got the space, so that's not the problem.
She likes to work out in a group, she told me, because people motivate each other.
I can relate to that.
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No bullying anymore

The girls feel so happy in their new groups at school that it hurts my heart even more that they've had such a bad two years.

The contactperson of school said he'd guarantee this year would be better and it already is.

All I hear now when they come home from school are happy stories and fun things about boys and a lot of other subjects.
No need to mail to school or discuss negative issues.

One of the reasons to end supervision is a change of situation.
We have it here.
I'm sure these class teachers will tell a complete different story than the former ones did.
These are far more comitted to their pupils too.
One of the girls has had more compliments about how she dresses than she ever had in a whole year. In fact, her former teacher blabbed that she didn't dress to his likings.
Yep, that's the guy who stirred all the trouble.

Let's hope these supervisors are sensible people.
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dark under my eyes

This morning I woke up with those dark under eye circles.
No wonder, I didn't sleep very well.

Again we did have heavy rainshowers. I'm starting to get worried about the tremendous amount of rain we've had this summer. We're living on, waht the call, heavy clay, but I think that's only the toplayer, as we know there has been a swamp here.
I wonder how much hold the trees have here now the ground is so filled with water.

I'm also worrying how I can fit in everything that needs to be done, and if those new supervisors will be susceptible for the truth or not.

In the past I treated those black patches with some camouflage make up, but I hardly use make up and I don't think it can be used anymore, as one can't keep make-up forever. Hygiene is as important as camouflage in this case.

So all I can do is try and enjoy my day, and certainly try to enjoy the appointment we have this afternoon.
I hope I'll sleep well next night and get rid of those nasty black patches.
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Thursday, September 16, 2010

The Continuing Story: podotherapist

My son has the worst toes you can imagine.
Deep embedded nails with the toes almost folding 10% over them.

So when he developed ingrown toenails after he had to cut his nails very short after bumping his toes against something firm we weren't surprised.

As he had to get new soles we were at the podotherapist.
A very nice guy who knows how to deal with my son so well that I would trust him with his life.
He treated the toenails, but had to hand it over to his boss because he's going to study again.

Today we went again and the boss tried very hard to be kind.
So very hard that it seemed to be artificial and fake.

Luckily my son was in a great mood and didn't mind. He didn't even mention it when we came home.

In fact he took it all quite well.
Maybe puberty is slowly leaving?

It's a pity his feet keep him from going to daycare/workexperience.
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First and new computers

Just the other day the girls asked how I experienced the entering of computers in my life.

It was at university.
One level of the building was suddenly completely emptied and one of the rooms was made into a climate chamber.
It was a huge room and it took days to convert it to a climate controled environment.

In the meantime all sorts of rumours could be heard.
One was persistent: a computer was about to arrive.

And then it came.
It was huge!
It took such a lot of space that the whole climate room was filled from top to bottom and the non climate controlled items covered half of the complete level of the building.

I didn't quite like the machine.
I was a good typist, but ofcourse I forgot to save.
No, I liked writing it down with my own fountainpen best.

Now we all have computers. Small ones, large ones, but none as large as the first one.
With the introduction of chips that enormous monster disappeared.

A few days ago I visited my former collegues of the university.
I told them about the question of my daughters and they showed me the newest rack mount computer which was nicely built in office furniture.
To work with the best of the best is not only a privilege, it's also a requierement nowadays to secure efficient research.

Me oh my! When we had such computerfacilities in my university years I would have become a researcher, without doubt.
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Wednesday, September 15, 2010

The first contact: a letter

Today we had a good a good start.
When getting the groceries the father of the children was seen by one of my best friends and she offered to take the groceries home by car.
So they made a round thorugh the supewrmarket to get quite a lot of heavy things and she brought them home.

We had a quick talk about what has happened the past weeks, and she had to laugh about it all. It's so ridiculous what is happening to us. It was good to use a lot of humor.
She knows me as a mother and friend and the way she reacted made me feel confident and OK.

I needed that, because a few hours later we got letters delivered statting they would come to visit us.
They've appointed two new people, so that's nice, but I'm not sure if one of them was here at the first talk.

If she is we're not happy with her, as she sat there as a tree, and didn't even make proper eye contact.
I don't like people who come into my house and don't communicate.
And we want to start with those supervisors with a clear slate.

So we wrote a letter stating we would like to deal with the complaint first. And get that matter settled.
That we want to have a talk with the supervisors and their teamleader, so that leader will not be talking about us but with us. Especially after so many mistakes have been made.
And we've asked them to make an appointment.

Well, it's all I could do for now.

I hope they won't interpret this negative, because it isn't meant that way.

I want them to see the facts, not speculate and interpret things in a negative way.
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Jane Dee and her so called life

Have you been at the blog called: "My so called life?" written by JaneDee?

I was a while ago. To be precisely at april 17 of this year, when I found a typing test at her blog. It's still there and I'm sure you'll enjoy trying to establish your typing skills. We bloggers sometimes have a great speed of typing. Some with two fingers, others with more. As long as we're able to write a post we're OK.

Jane Dee is a nurse by profession, and that's clear from many posts on her blog.
You can see the efficiency all over it: short powerful posts. Like the one about intravenous therapy training.

It's a pity the blog isn't updated more often. I love to see more posts like the one written yesterday.
You should see the video in it. It's awesome!
We don't have that sort of throwing and tossing people around. Do you?
I wonder if Jane Dee sometimes wonder if this hobby is healthy for young children.

For those who celebrate their birthday at june 12: share it with Jane Dee too, because june 12 is her birthday.

We have to keep that in mind.
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Tuesday, September 14, 2010

Today, another day is over.

Yesterday evening and today the news was very interesting for us.
The president of the Court of The Hague stated that judges are not reading everything they need to read because of lack of time.

Hmmm.

That seems to have happened on our case too: a judge not reading what should have been read and balanced in her mind.

It still bothers me that we didn't get a proper courtsession with a search for the truth.
What we experienced was so very below level that a group elders under the main tree of the village would have done far better. I'm sorry, no offense intended, but that's how I really feel.

I'm no unfit mother and my girls are perfectly allright.

Well, we didn't hear anything today from those supervisors, but we got a mail for the complaint commission that their teamleader will get in contact soon to meet about our complaint.
Good.

I have to make a logo for this line of posts. :)
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Monday, September 13, 2010

Manic Monday #222

Imagine you can only keep 5 things that you have (people not included).
What 5 things would you keep?


  1. The box with the few things I have from my little daughters who died. I'd probably slip a few things in there from my dad and grandmother, so ...eh...my box of memories
  2. my bagpipes
  3. a mall booklet made when I was about 19 with comments from my friends on the person I was at that time, and poetry.
  4. jewelry box. Not for the money, but for the memories
  5. photobooks


What's the hardest thing you've ever had to learn?

To deal with the dead of my children, and to deal with those socalled child protectors who threatened to take my girls from their home.

Today is the first day of the rest of my life and I'm going to... try to fulfill my dreams, whatever other people say or do.

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Looking for a cricket blog?

During all my years on internet, especially during the years of blogging and surfing blogs every day I've seen a lot of sportsblogs come and go.
Interesting is that the most advanced techniques were used on blogs that are no longer online. Those who stayed are updated frequently, have a clear layout, and are not filled with advertisements.

One of them is a cricket blog called CricketAvatar.
Since it was aired on january 1 2010 it was updated almost daily. Mainly with game reviews, opinions and other posts like we bloggers write.

Even though the blog is written in Mangalore, India, posts are about cricket all over the world and visitors come from all over the world too.
Probably not only for the posts, but also for the Live Scores from Cricinfo which are situated at a prominent place at the site.

It's a pity that such a nice blog doesn't provide a direct link to the rules of the game.
It's not a sport that is played here, but I would like to understand the ins and outs, so I would be able to enjoy cricket too.

But when you understand cricket I'm sure you'll spend quite some time at this nice blog reading lots of interesting information.
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Under supervision

The girls went to school this morning feeling a bit tense.
They're "under supervision" now.

Because some teacher said things (that weren't true at all), like they were afriad of going to school. it was concluded they're lagged in development. Which is completely nuts when I compare them to their peers.
School agrees with me.
Because one of the girls was treated very bad by some adults, including that teacher, we thought it good to have her see a therapist. We found the best one we could ever find. She's independent, uses her brains and heart, and concluded that my girl is fine. Absolutely fine. Right where she should be in her development.

Yea, tell me. I've worked with young people that age and a bit older for 10 years. I know.

But hej...strangers know it better nowadays.

It's strange they're not the ones who are observed and told what to do, but I'm the one who has to jump and sit like a marionnette, like a puppet-on-a-string. Because I'm their mother and I'm responsible for them.
OK, as long as they leave them alone.

Interesting is however, that
  • the problems were at school, not at home,
  • the problems were last year, not this year
  • we can't define any lag in development
So we don't know what we have to do to improve ourselves to get rid of the supervision.

Last week we filed a complaint against the supervisors as they didn't behave properly before court. (That's said nicely)
I got a reply from the complaints commission within a few days, and I've replied back already.
So I'm not waiting for an invitation to speak with their supervisor, and I want them off the case.

A new start with someone who's able to understand what we're going through is the first requirement.
I don't need a boss, I need someone who want to work with the facts.

Facts are that my girls feel happy at school and are doing perfectly well. Their group teachers are OK and they don't spread nonsense stories about them.
They're as far in development as their friends of the same age (and older), and I stimulate them in becoming responsible independent women.

Oh yes, it was said I didn't stimulate them to develop.
I still have to laugh about this, even though it's a very serieus accusation.

I'm a mom who stimulated a son with asperger syndrome and ADD to become a responsible adult, working in ICT now, living independent.
I also stimulated a son with PDD-NOS and schoolfobia (because he was physically attacked in front of school by a group of 20 because he protected a friend from burglary, and the school stated they couldn't guarantee it wouldn't happen again) to find his way through life. He's now almost ready with his studies for photographer and he already works as a press-photographer for a paper. He lives independent.
I also stimulated a son with serieus ADHD and serious dyslexia to overcome his worst reading problems and he's just starting his education to become a security agent.
I also stimulated a classic autistic son to look people in the eyes, talk with them, travel by bus and do a lot more, even though he still needs to be told to wash his hair with shampoo and hates strange people in HIS home. He hates to leave his home, but I got him as far that he goes out every week to do something with someone outside the family, and he's trying again at a daycare/workexperience place, even though he has to deal with strong inner obstacles.

I stimulated my little girls to live after they were born with serious rhesus problems. We fought for their lives and they stayed alive.
One of them is seriously dyslectic, but I thought her to read, letter by letter written on her hands. Playing games with them, trying to make her see the letter and hear the sound that belonged to it in her head. I can't understand now how I was able to invent so many games and could be able to give her so much fun, that she loves to read now, even though it takes her a long time.
She's doing so well at school, that she now goes to a level which is three levels above the one they thought she could deal with. She loves to study, loves to go to school, even though that d.mn teacher said she was afraid to go to school.

Both my girls were stimulated to take lessons in music. They're babgpipe-pupils, have tought themselves piano and guitar (like I did when I was young). They even initiated with friends their own band.
They're both very good ballet dancers.
They're very open people ready to face the world, finding out what they want to know. Not the pityfull creatures that teacher said they were: not feeling well with themselves, not able to be with a group.
They're both active members of a nice group of friends, one writes for the schoolpaper, the other is anti-bullying activist. (Guess that's why that teacher didn't like them).

I'm afraid those supervisors will force them into all sorts of therapies and make them into a sort of therapyjunks, by telling them over and over again they're not good enough.

These girls are OK.
Wonderful young women, who are able to make up their own mind, take responsible decisions and look open into the future.

How on earth did that judge accept that nasty and false description of them while she had them both sitting right in front of her?

I don't understand.

So now I wait.
For the invitation to talk about our complaint.
For those supervisors to take over our lives?
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My babies and baby-carriers

It's not true that all autistic babies don't bond and it's not true they don't like physical contact with the mother.
Most of the autistic babies love to be close to their mother and they certainly bond with her.

In fact two of my autistic sons loved to be close to me and they needed to feel I was near to relax properly.

Even though I was hesistant to use it, I bought an ergo baby carrier and carried these young children with me.

Except when I was cooking, because I used to put them in their beds during cooking time so I wouldn't be caught between caring for my children and caring I wouldn't burn the whole house down. :)

I never used a carried when the children were newborn.
Some people do, but I doubt if that's good for them.
As long as I was able to carry them on my arm I would. Supporting the head and backbone, giving them plenty of freedom to move and develop their muscles.

The only times I used a carrier when the babies were newborn was when I had to go with the pram by bus.
We had to fold the pram before entering the bus, and where should one leave the baby?
You see. The carrier was great then!

But when they were a bit older the carrier saved my day so often that I took the carrier with me everywhere.
It enabled me to have both hands free and do whatever I needed to do, except heavy duty housework.

Some people even wear a carrier and baby on the bicycle, but I didn't do that. Imagine falling... No, that was a risk I wouldn't take.

Now the carriers (we had two) are upstairs, waiting for new children and parents to enjoy them.
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Sunday, September 12, 2010

Development of the Spitfire

My father worked in WW2 at the Royal Air Force in England and worked with Spitfires (among other planes).
So when I heard a movie was starting at the BBC about the development of the Spitfires I sat down and watched it, together with one of the girls.

It appeared to be a movie from 1942, directed by Leslie Howard, with Lesie Howard himself, David Niven, Rosamund John, Roland Culver and many others.

Knowing that a whole country has been saved by Spitfires gives a special aspect to watching this movie.

But now we know that in fact it was the utter dedication of Reginald J. Mitchell that really saved Great Britain.
He was motivated by his wife to keep on brging his ideas to the attention of those people who could enable him to built the plane.
Ofcourse they didn't want to get involved at first.
Like with so many great ideas that are pushed aside because people can't think outside their frame of mind.

But someone was convinced and wanted to take the risk, and so the whole development was set in motion.
Witnessing the Germans boasting about destroying England, already before WW2 Mitchell felt a strong inner urge to create a plane that was even better than the one he already had developed. One which could land on land.

When he heard that he either had to stop working altogether or would die in about 8 months time, he decided for the last option, because he was convinced his country needed the Spitfire to be strong enough against the Germans.
He was able to see it fly before he died.

Southampton Airport is one of the places where Spitfires were based.
They want to rename the airport into: R J Mitchell International Airport in his honor.
It's unknown of it will ever happen, but fact is that Great Britain should be more aware of the men who saved the country at the cost of their own lives.
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Our friends and their motorhomes

A few of our friends have spend their vacation travelling Europe in a moterhome.
It was the first time for all of them and they've all enjoyed it very much.

It's positive to be able to watch the weatherforecast and decide that travelling somewhere else is the best option.
With a motorhome one is free to leave and go anywhere.

In the past we never had a vacation like that. We either went by bus or train and thus were very limited to go elsehere.
I'm sure we'd had more vacations when we'd been able to afford a motorhome. My autistic kids had problems adjusting to a new place to sleep and a morothome would have been familiar enough for them to feel well.

Yesterday was a wonderful day here and many cleaned their motorhomes and prepared them for the winter.
One of the boys was asked to go with the owner for motorhome repairs.
They had to travel quite a long stretch, because they have the winteracomodation and the repairstation at another part of the country. They used to live there and want to live there again, so they never tried to find something more convenient in this part of the country.

When I asked my friend why he needed his motorhome checked he said he did it every year, because he wanted to know everything was done before the winter and the next vacationseason. he has a good and extended service plan, so he wouldn't be faced with extra costs.

Very wise.
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First week of school was great!

The girls had a very good time at school past week.
Even though they've only spent a week in their new group with new class teachers they say they've had a better time in one week than in two years at the former group.

That sounds marvellous, doesn't it.

The only disappointment or what ever you want to call it is that one of the girls has the former class teacher now as regular teachers, so she's confronted with her bad memories day after day, and is confronted with someone who has spoken so bad about her.
He told lies about her and me with far reaching consequences. We're dealing with the consequences and he's feeling on top of the world. Ugh.

But the group is great and she's able to show him that she's not the girl he described.

The school has been renovated... that is, part of it.
It looks far more open than before and the area where they have to spend their breaks isn't as gloomy anymore, but looks quite modern.

All in all, we're happy with this change.

Now we're heading towards a lot of informative paren't evenings.
For us quite boring, as we heard the rules for the exams for three kids already.
But the way things are going we can't skip one of those evenings.
I feel lucky they're not information for all the parents only, but part of the time will be spend in a smaller group, getting to know the class teachers and maybe discussing important issues.

I'm looking forward to a couple of normal class teachers, who are friendly and act normal.
It will be such a relief!
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Vacations

We all miss the feeling one has after a good vacation.
As we had no proper relaxation that lasted longer than a day, as we didn't have the chance to take our minds of serious things, we can say that our vacation was no vacation at all.

I've been surfing internet to see if I could find a good last minute vacation for all of us, but couldn't find anything.

Wish we lived at the other side of the world so we could book a 3 or 4 day trip at Orlando Theme Park Vacations.
Orlando vacations are affordable and fun. A few days at Disney World, Sea World or Universal won't be a real problem, compared to what we have to pay here.
It's wonderful that whole packages can be booked, so you won't have too look for tickets, a hotel, transport. But you can get it all in one of you want.
And ofcourse you can buy tickets only, if you'd rather to do that.
It's your own choice.

I don't like golf at all, but those who do can have days to their heart's delight without coming home without a penny.

Visit their site and you'll know.

In the meantime we'll watch the rain and see something positive in that.
We've never seen so much rain in a summer.
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Tell Her No



1. When was the last time that you had to tell someone that you loved, that the answer was no?

I just told my son "no" when he asked if I would bake an applepie tomorrow.

2. When was the last time you visited a hospital?

A few weeks ago. To visit a friend.

3. If you were to start a club, what would the subject matter be, and what would you name it?

Dunno.

4. Have you ever hit someone of the opposite sex?

No, why?

5. What's the first thing you notice about the preferred sex?

If he reacts to my words or to my smiles.

6. What really turns you on?

In the good or the bad way?

7. What was your biggest mistake?

Thinking the judge would see the truth.

8. Tell us something totally random about yourself.

Well, when it is the first thing that pops-up in my mind it isn't really random. LOL!
I'm enjoying a cup of mushroom soup right now.

9. Has anyone ever said you looked like a celebrity?

Yea, when I was young that I was as small as Twiggy.
They said I sounded like Kiri Te kanawa. Blogged about that this evening.

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Logo made by me with tubes from Outlaw by Design.
You can request the logo, but only when you'll credit properly.
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Inventory

One of my sons started working today at one of the shops I went to when I was at university.
It just for a limited time as the woman he replaces is pregnant, but he doesn't mind.
Working there is such a pleasure.

Today was extra special because one of his customers was an old friend. He was able to sell a rather expensive item to him.
And as an extra he had to unpack items from his favorite wholesale shop. He thought he had to put away a few items, but it turned out that his new boss had bought the whole inventory. All cothing and accessories, all watches and consumer electronics.
He asked why and it turned out the shopowner died this week.
We knew he had cancer, but didn't know that he already died.

It's strange to hear that in such a way.
Turned out he had sold a lot before he became too ill, and then offered the rest as a full truckload to his friend, which is now my son's boss.

They gave the items a special place and soon people came in asking for them.

Life goes on.
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Saturday, September 11, 2010

Kiri Te Kanawa

I thought she didn't perform anymore: Kiri Te Kanawa.
Dame Kiri Te Kanawa I should say.
She's a wonderful worldfamous soprano.

A few years ago I'd planned to go to one of her last concerts, but one way or another it never happened.

And because of all that happened the past months we forgot our plans to attend the last night of the proms, otherwise I would have seen she'd be performing in Hyde Park tonight. I would certainly have gone.

One of my dreams has been to be at one of her concerts.
I used to sing with a clear soprano voice and people told me often I sounded just like her. Which was a huge compliment.
I haven't practiced for quite a while.

I bet she has.
She sounded beautiful, and I'm glad I've seen those 5 minutes on TV.
Pity I didn't see more.
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The best for my babies

When I expected my first child, my grandmother asked me about my ways of making the baby's bed.

As I wanted the best for my baby, I told her I wanted fresh linen with maybe some embroidery (which was in fashion then), folded in a very neat way over the other bedwear.
She smiled and said nothing.

When the baby was born I didn't have much money, so I had plain white sheets, folded so neat that the district nurse gave me compliments when I came for my baby's first check. That was quite something, I can tell you that.

My gram came to visit me and saw the baby sleeping so lovely, that she not only wanted pictures, but smiled again.
A week later she called to ask if a visitor was welcome. She wanted to bring me something.

That something was a nice pile with sheets, and a nice pile of pillow covers.
All embroidered in blue, as I had a boy.

Some were real matouk linens. The best there were and are in the world.

I've used the bedlinens for every child and I was careful with them in the laundry.
They're still beautiful and one of my girls has already asked if she's allowed to use them when she has a baby.
She's 14...

My grandmom is long gone. All I have from her is an old clock which doesn't work anymore, a watch which has found the same fate, and the bedlinens.

A still see her smile when I think about this.
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Now I know better

They had me fooled.

I believed people who worked in child protection did a fine job.
Now I know better.

I believed a judge would take cases serious and would be able to see through manipulations and reports without facts.
Now I know better.



My main argument in the courtcase was that there were no facts to be found in the report of child protection about us.
The judge even wrote that down.
It's nowhere to be found in the transcripts.

I know what I said, I wrote it down immediately after court.
And I wrote it down before, plenty of times as a reaction to the reports.

Yes... the judge finally decided, 9 days after she would make a decision!
During those 9 days I hoped she would have read the comments I'd written on the reports, but it's clear she hasn't.

Even worse. When we went to court we didn't know the name of the judge. They should have informed us.
When we went home, we didn't know the name.

Now I know the name. She's expeosed on internet as the judge who talks outside court about the cases with child protection.
We should have been able to ask for another judge. We would have if we'd known her name.

This is no justice, this is a plain violation of law and children's rights.

My kids are placed under supervision because I'm considered a bad mom.

The facts are however that a social worker planned to prevent me from working in my profession a few years ago, and my daughter used a lie to get attention for bullying at school. The whole system jumped on my daughter, making her say yes to things that never happened at all, and jumped on us stating that they would take our daughters from us when we would deny.

We didn't deny. We believed that child protection would see through the whole evil thing and find us a good and sound family.
Then a teacher at school spoke out against our daughter as revenge for her exposing him as leaning back instead of taking action against bullying.
He also said things about me and my relationship with my husband which are untrue.
Even though the spokesperson of school said that was not right the teacher was believed.

So here we are... parents under supervision.
That hurts so very deep, I can't tell you.

We should sue school and the teacher, we should appeal in court, but we just can't afford it.

We are placed under supervision whereas in fact school should be placed under supervision.
At home things are OK. We don't have problems raising the children.
The school had problems keeping the teachers in order and had problems dealing with bullying in that group.

Well, my girl was able to change things at school.
So's reached her goal and I'm very happy for her and the children involved.
But at what cost?

I'm a great mom. I know it. My kids know it.
My friends know it.

But I'm told straight in my face that I'm on the same line as unfit mothers, junkies and the like.

That hurts... I can tell you.

I trusted the system, I trusted the law.
But the law here doesn't care for facts... In fact the law wasn't even to write a proper transcript of what was said in court.

Unbleievable.

I feel such a fool.
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Friday, September 10, 2010

The bus and loud voices

Using the bus to go to town most of the time means listening to other people's conversations.
I try not to. I feel it's impolite to do so and I don't care to hear what other people have to say to other people. Unless they're talking to or with me.

But sometimes people have such a loud voice or are such verbal exhibitionists that one can't escape hearing what they spread into the air.

Sometimes it comes in handy.
I'm completely updated about the new nurses course at the academic hospital and updated on present views on research philosophy, thanks to the bus to the university.

Going back to town gave me an insight in the best eye cream for wrinkles and the traffic situation in front of one of the schools.

ofcourse I won't inform you about more private conversations. You know the ones on the phones when people are almost yelling because the bus makes too much noise for the speaker to be heard at the other end of the line.
It's always funny when they're not aware the bus stops, so they will go on yelling for a few more sentences before they realise they're placing themselves in the middle of the attention.

I bet you share these experiences with me.
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Arriving late at a young age creates a habit

In Belgium a new campaign has started to get all schoolchildren in time at school.

Reserach showed that young children often arrive at school late, because the parents consider playschool not a real school and think that a few minutes late won't matter.

But these few minutes are of importance.
Not only is the welcome of the teacher missed, which means a missed opportunity to bond and create trust and understanding, but arriving late becomes a habit.
These children will arrive late at school at later ages too and then they'll miss important information.

When my children were young they never had the chance to arrive late.
I brought them to school in time and I always stressed the importance of being in time.
The playschool they visited opened in a special way, by opening the door and enabling children to put their coats at their own special place. Those who were well in time would witness the teacher opening the curtain between the entrance and the classroom.
It was a small ceremony, and loved by all children, because at that age they love peekaboo.

The children who were in time, but a bit later would miss that. So my kids always wanted to be at school ahead of time.

When they were older and left without me I would start nagging when they were running late. So they gladly speeded up their actions and left.
The school taking notes of those who arrived late helped too. As did giving compliments to children who were always in time.

Nowadays I don´t have to put an effort in making them leave home in time.
The girls like the feeling to arrive in time and have some time to talk with their friends or having a last look at their homework.

And I myself?
I hate being late.
I like to catch my breath and feel comfortable when I arrive somewhere.
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Good news when you want a sales job

One of my online friends mailed me a few moments ago. She's so happy that it was catching.

Her husband lost his job due to the recession and they nearly lost their home.
Because her family stepped in and gave them money, and because they found someone who wanted to rent a room, they could stay.

Today her husband found a sales job with a good (more than good) salary and at his own level of education.
He had two meetings there and got the call soon after the second meeting, so the decision had been clearly for him, as they told at the last meeting that they still had to see people for a complete day ahead.
All of them were calcelled he was told at the phone.

I'm so very happy for them!

In case you want a sales job too, go to SalesHeads.com.

You can post your resume, search jobs, in general or at your own town, and you can benefit from their job seeker tools and other resources to find a job.
It's online, so it's very easy and straightforward.

Create your own future, start now.
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He missed my mail!

Yesterday I got a call from the school of the girls.
During the talk we had this week I mentioned the fact that we still didn't have an official reaction to our complaint.
We did have a concept, we gave our comments and that was it.

In court we had to present the judge the concept, because that was all we had.
Not the way it was supposed to be.

He's the spokesperson of school and I'd send it to the secretary, so he asked a copy.
Am I lucky I still had one!!

So now we're waiting for the official version of the reaction to our complaint and when the judge still hasn't decided on our case (it's 9 days past the time she would make her decision known) we'll send it straight to her.

It's a pity that we have to deal with people who are too busy to finish letters.
Our comments arrived at school at july 1.
I can understand they missed it though as it was the last week of school.
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Shopping at online auctions

I love to order special presents online. Sometimes because I can't find the items here in town, sometimes because it's very convenient because I don't have to leave my home, can shop in the middle of the time, and because I can have the item send to it's destination straighaway without standing in line at the postoffice. (Last time I stood there a full hour!)

Like most people I visit the wellknown selling and actionsite frequently, but recently I've changed my habit and I visit Webstore.
A friend referred me there because she's seen an online auction for some coins she didn't have in her collection yet.
She said it was best to go there, because sellers don't have to pay a fee and thus you'll get what you pay for.

I was very pleasantly surprised by the way the system worked and told her so.
She's living in Omaha and told me about one of the features of the site: finding online stores in your own area or town.
She found a shop that sold books and she ordered quite a pile of them and was able to collect them herself. For one dollar a piece she had a huge pile of comics and they kept her kids happy during the vacation.

Sound great, doesn't it?
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Waiting for him to come back

The father of the children is to hospital because a surgeon has to have a look at his hand.

There is a groth on his finger that is causing problems.

It's there for quite a while now.

He noticed it as an irritated area after carrying grocery bags.
So he thought there was too much weight in the bags and they got the bloodcirculation down.
As it stopped irritating after a while he didn't pay any attention.

Then he injured himself grasping something, because the skin on a growth was scrapped against a rough surface.
He put a plaster on it and didn't pay any attention.

Well, during the years it has grown so much that it is bigger than a medium sized marble and after a lot of toodoo from us he finally showed it to the family physician, who referred him immediately to the surgeon.
For two appointments: one to have a look and make a guess what it could be, and one for removal.

because he wanted two appointments and not one, we drew the conclusion he was thinking it might be malignant, and told him so. He admitted that was his thought, but he also stated it could be all sorts of things, so he wanted the surgeon to consider the cause and act upon knowledge, instead of removing the thing, send it to the lab and then find out he should have been more carefull during removal.

So the finger is looked at right at this moment and I'm waiting for him to return home or call.
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Steel buildings

We've got an area not far away that has been transformed from agricultural land into an office area.
Because of building constrictions there have been quite some issues about the area, and it attracted our attention. So when the sun came out yesterday, we took our bicyles and went there to see what has become of it all.

Because it was said the whole area was filled with steel buildings we expected a kind of hangar-like environment.

Nothing of it all!

It was plain amazing what we saw.

Ofcourse we saw some warehouses far away from the main area, and roads with garages and mini-storage warehouse buildings, but we also saw offices which looked exactly like stone buildings, with nice features in the roof, coloured glass and painted walls.
One part of the area, along the main road, residential steel building houses with lovely gardens gave such a friendly impression, that we stopped and had a good look around, to be sure we were still in the officie area.
We were. Lawyers, a dentist, a broker, all sorts of professions found themselves a place there and it really looked awesome.

I think we're past the time that steel meant only walls and roofs.
Right now you can design your own home and have it built from steel. Wow!
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Thursday, September 9, 2010

Stolen bicylce returned

When a bicycle is stolen it's gone forever.
That's what we and plenty of other people have experienced for oh so many years.
Most never report a stolen bicycle to the police.
So even though they state that they've receieved 3.337 reports last year, it's only a part of whats really stolen.

In most cities about 2 to 3% return to the owner because of police effort.
Oh no, not because they've conducted an extensive search.
More because they put a number in the system and the computer finds a match.

In my town I've never heard someone tell that the police found a bicycle back.
And neither did the journalist who wrote about one special case of a returned bicycle.

So it's the news of the day: stolen bicylce returned
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Inventions: knives and cutters

Just a few days ago the schoolbooks arrived and when opening the box one of the girls got a cut because the rubbed her fingers against the harsh material.
You know those nasty papercuts. They hurt a lot and are almost the same as the cuts of sharp knives.

So I was not surprised to find some very handy knives and cutters, probably invented by someone who had the same experience with papercuts as many of us.

I hate opening boxes, but I do like the surprise which in it. :)

Martor USA however has plenty of tools to slice and cut and opening boxes won't be a problems anymore with the box cutter.
Some say it's only for businesses, but that's not true.
Everyone should have special equipment for heavy duties and DIY.
It saves time and accidents.

In fact, I have some safety equipment here, because some autistic boys like to DIY but forget they have to care not to cause injuries.

The box cutter is a fine invention for all of us.
No need to try to get the scissors through strong plastic closures of boxes, because the special cutter cuts the box of with one simple stroke along the sides.
You can see a movie on their site to show how it works.

Years ago I bought the Regelsafe, but I didn't know how to change the blade.
Just one look at the video showed me how, leaving my husband standing there and watching in utter amazement, because he thought I would run to him for help.
Haha!!

So have a look at the site yourself and see what can be used either at the job or at home.
I bet you'll find something!
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Choice between montessori and regular school

Hi Helen. Here's the answer to your question.

My boys first went to a regular school.
It was just two streets away from home. All that was special was that they wouldn't see one car. as it was a carfree area, but had to cross a bridge over water. And you know how boys are with water. LOL!
So even without the danger of cars I had to bring them anyway.

The curriculum was the same as at any other regular school. 2 hours of gymnastics at the most, and as the school shared facilities with another school, they always had to leave the building for that.
The teachers were nice, but some of them gave me the feeling the'd seen it all.
They were very accepting of kids with different kinds of behaviour, so they missed for example autism.

I took my boys from school because they didn't react to bullying at all.
During playhour the kids were outside and the teacher in front of the mirror, redoing her lips. Not one time, often.
I can't tell you how often it happened that we walked by and had to enter the premisses to end a fight. And none of the teachers nor the pricipal seeing that.

The Montessorischool was further away, but they offered lunchtime supervision for those who stayed.
The costs however were too high for us, considering we lived 5 minutes bicycling from there.
So I went to and fro 4 times a day, had my children for lunch and had plenty of contact with other moms at the schoolgate. I've made quite some friends there.
And so did the children.

Apart from large gatherings at the opening of the week and closing at friday, with theatre, music and other fun, they had groupgatherings and lots of individual learning either completely alone or with children at the same level.
So with each subject their social environment changed, and with the teachers being very aware of that, they got support whenever needed.
Most of my boys did very well there and had hardly any problems with their autism. The girls had a perfect time.

As parents we had to keep a close watch on their progress. As the philosophy is that each child develops in it's own way, they were sometimes far too tolerant of individual varieties between pupils. So they didn't catch my daughters dyslexia and even told me one of my sons wasn't dyslectic at all. Which he was and still is.

They followed their own curriculum, but with a close watch on what children were supposed to do when they left school. So in the end they managed to do the same as other kids. Especially children who develop well without pressure that kind of school is perfect.
The additional skills they learn, like planning, keeping an agenda, asking questions, presenting themselves, etc etc are important for later life.

I loved the fact that we could discuss the fact that even when the ministery stated 2 hours of gymnastics were enough, the parents wanted 4 hours. We threw the money together to hire the teacher for an extra 2 hours and they fitted those hours in at their own gymnasticsroom.

There are other important differences to be adresses, but that's for another time.
I assume there's enough to think about after reading this.
You know where to find me.
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Finding the best bedroom furniture

While my children are getting used to their new classmates and teachers, other young people are taking their first steps towards independence and are moving from home to create a new home for themselves.

A few friends called if I would assist their children set up their own home.
So for one of the girls.. eh... young women I'm looking for contemporary furniture for her bedroom.

Her dad has plenty of enough, so we don't need to roam the second hand shops, but we can go for the best at ERoomService, where the best desgner furniture is available online.

She has already decided for a very wonderful socalled nest rotating library, a compact shelving unit that can be approached from 4 sides.
With this choice she's made a clear statement.

Now we're looking for contemporary bedroom furniture. It's possible to go for a complete set, or to mix and match styles, looks, kinds of material and such.
She has already found a very excentric nightstand, so the choice for a bed will reflect her taste too.
She loves the different designer styles which are found on the site.
I like the fact that ERoomService has a fast way of giving you options through a choice menu, like storage, size, kind of finish, accent finish etc.
In the same menu wooden slats are given as an option, so there's no need to shop for them elsewhere and they sure will fit.

It's nice to look around for someone who knows that buying something good will be cheaper in the end, because it will last so much longer.
I'm looking forward to her finished bedroom.
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Wednesday, September 8, 2010

A schoolbuilding and education

It's so quiet here.

The rain has finally stopped, the storm is blowing around houses elsewhere, no young children in the playground behind our garden, and... only my autistic son at home.

The others are to school.

The girls already on their regular schedules, which will be adjusted next week (how come: regular?) and the only son left apart from the autistic one is to school to get a uniform (he'll be studying security) and a pile of books. he'll also get an introduction to the enormous building.

He doesn't need that. In fact he hates the building, and he knows that for sure after studying there for a year.
It feels like a prison: everyone needs to get a special ID or a visitors pass, and to use the elevators one needs to have a special pass.
It's like a city where you need to turn a key to enter a road.

The architect probably new of this and he designed a building that is: transparent.
Yep. It's almost all glass and windows.
Even the walls of the classrooms are kind of tranparent. They are huge glass windows/walls, with a broad strip of medium transparent one coloured photo.
You can see everyone walk by, step by step, but you can't see the face, because that merges with the faces on the semi-transparent photo.

Imagine to sit in such a room when you're dealing with ADHD. People walking by every so many minutes, You can see their socks and shoes, their bags, trousers or skirts. But not their faces.

This year his studies will bring him for months at other locations to learn his profession in the practical situation.
He's already telling me he's going to enjoy that a lot.

Well, I like a positive attitude towards learning, but I would like to see him more enthousiastic for the building, because that will facilitate learning too.
He needs to get through his theory exams to get his diploma.

I'm glad the school has found out that the building poses huge difficulties for people with ADHD.
They have special people now who work with students with ADHD to improve their planningskills and such.
But maybe they'd better have used the money to plaster those semi-transparent walls.
.
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Wilmington NC real estate

Our wish to move to another country has broadened our vision a lot.
Not only do we think different about job opportunities, but also about the place where we want to live and housing.
We've found out that looking everywhere on the world enables a better description of our needs and wishes.

This new development is due to a friend in Brunswick County who told us that his family is so happy to live there that he thinks we would be too.

Considering the fact that one of my boys want to have a future in television and movieproduction we decided that Wilmington NC would be a good choice for us. Especially because this mom will have the beaches within reach!

Before making any decisions we had a look at Wilmington NC real estate. Without a proper place to live and good jobs moving there is out of the question.

Finding the best real estate agents was not a real problem as our friend recommended Century 21 Sweyer & Associates. The firm relies on 23 years of experience in the area and as they are located there, they know the properties and their surroundings very well.

I simply love internet and it's options, and I soon found the right place to find a
Wilmington NC real estate that fits our needs.
The listings page allows to fill in the prize range, amount of beds and baths, property styles, location, property features and even lot features and schools. The last is ofcourse a gorgeous option, because our children need to finish their education at a proper school.

I had a quick look at the new listings, which can be reached with ease from a lot of pages, including the main one, and found some very attractive properties.
I'm always amazed when I see that one gets so much more house than here for the same amount of money.

Another feature of the site I love is the link to new home communities. It seems to be so much easier to start in another country in a new home community, where the people in the neighbourhood are new too.

We're also considering the option of renting. It enables us to experience living there and perhaps make better choices, as we can have a quiet look around and not leave the choice to others.
Century 21 Sweyer & Associates offers the option of renting too, with a pleasant form to find a good listing that fits our needs.

I don't worry about relocation, not really, because the relocation staff will be able to inform us about everything we need to know: schools, shops, transportation, and anything else we need to know.

Isn't this a nice way to dream about the future?
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Tuesday, September 7, 2010

Aww.. she's got those teachers again!

One of the girls had during two years the same classteachers. People who failed in so many ways, that the group didn't have as good a time as other groups.
Apart from that: one of them created the story that we're part of a sect, which we're not, and we're still troubled by that, because tales like that don't leave the earth very easy.
The other one told my daughter was a depressed, fearfull girls with no friends or social life at school at all. And he also said some ugly things about me, and he doesn't even know me! And he told it to child protection, who assumed he was right and even though there was no one else saying something bad about our girl, we were brought to court because they considered us bad parents.



Well, yesterday she heard she has the same teachers again. Not as class teachers though, but her first lesson in the new year was with the guy who said so many bad things about her.
I feel so sorry for her. I think she's very brave to stay calm and quiet, even though she has no choice.

We've filed our complaints and now we're trying to get the right people around the table.
Because matters were handled during the vacation the organisation proposed a meeting with the person who is under normal circumstances in charge, but who was on vacation when our case was dealt with. She's the one who is mainly responsable.
But...someone else took over during the vacation and we think it's that person we should talk with too. Because he allowed the team to go forward on the wrong path they were taking.
Which probably means he's going on vacation first... and then we'll have a meeting.
(Hmmm.... I would love to have a vacation too.)

Next wednesday we'll finally have a meeting at school again.
I'm not happy with the way school is following up on their agreements.
It was agreed upon that we'd meet the new classteachers before the schoolyear and it hasn't happened, even though I was early enough to enable to plan something.

What did they think? That it would blow over?

Well, it's raining and inside the house it's feeling like autumn.

Maybe time for the big change of clothes: unpacking the summer wardrobes.
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Monday, September 6, 2010

Manic Monday #221



What's the main thing that builds your self-confidence and why?

The main thing... eh...
Well, I've left the ego-things.
In fact I feel best when I'm feeling Ok with myself. Feel in touch with the rest in me.
When I can stick to the way I want to live then I feel confident.

What lessons in humility have you learned over the course of your life?

Nature is stronger.
We might be able to ban the bugs from our homes, but nature shakes the homes when she wants to.

How do you combat negative thoughts?

I tell myself to stop or I just observe my thoughts without clinging on to them. Than enables me to let my thoughts drift and when something comes around to do I do it with concentration.
Mindfulness.

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Sunday, September 5, 2010

Last day of the vacation



I feel so sorry for the girls. Now school starts the weather is getting better.
I know we can't have it all, but a few sunny afternoons would have been nice.

Today is the day for odd jobs around the house, like every last day of the vacation.
A last check of the bicycles, control of reserve keys, tidying rooms, drilling holes in the wall for new things or old things on new places, making a list of what really should be done the next week (mainly lots of calls), making a list of things that need to be done this month, putting the agenda at a place where everyone sees it a couple of times a day, etc etc.

We're getting ready for a new routine.

Now the girls go to seperate classes and seperate levels it means a set of extra parent's evenings at the same school, and something to be careful with: extra paperwork.
So I bought a set of drawers, one for each kid, and one for all, so we won't mess up things.

We're trying not to look back on this vacation.
It has been a pure disaster, with 30 minutes at the beach and nowhere else special.
Well, I'm grateful that at least I've been there, but it has been far too short.

Tomorrow the buddhism courses start.

I wished to do two of them:

1. The tangka painting class.
I could afford 60 euro, but when I wanted to subscribe it was raised to 100 euro.
It's not much for what is taught there, but it's too much.

2. Lamrim class
The buddhistic centre here requires following this class for further studies.
It uses the texts of Lama Je Tsongkhapa: the three principles and the commentary on it of Kyabje Gelek Rimpoche: the three principles, commentary... (Jewel Heart)
Even without the texts the course is far out of reach: 200 euro.

So I guess it's self education again, like most in my life.
I feel a bit disappointed, because finally I decided to do something for myself and again it's not possible.

We first have to find a way to pay the enormous pile of bills of the lawyer: 1500 euro.
We've never had a loan, never were in debt, so it doesn't feel good at all.

Not really thoughts for the end of a vacation...
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Saturday, September 4, 2010

Half the Man I Used to Be



1. Do you feel that you are essentially the same person that your were ten years ago?

Yes, I'm me.
But I have changed too.
I have more self-esteem, I feel more worthy of a place in this world.
I'm more at ease with myself. More restful within myself and according to others they feel and see that too.

I'm perfectly OK to take the plunge in the deep whenever I'll get the chance, so I'm really waiting for an opportunity to move to the UK, instead of only thinking of it. Well, waiting... looking for, is far more better. I'm actively seeking, making plans.

2. Is there something that you have to give all or nothing to?

In fact I either give nothing or everything. I'm not a kind of half person.
I'm either very enthousiastic or I forget it.

3. Have you ever gambled? What have you bet on and for how much?

No. And I don't feel like doing so.

4. Can you sleep anywhere or does it have to be in a bed?

I used to be able to sleep everywhere, but now I'm a bit older I don't mind something comfortable. I haven't sleep anywhere else for some time now.

5. Tell us about the most disastrous or embarrassing first impression you've ever made on someone.

Hmmm... Don't know. Don't care.
I guess my hair was not doing what I wanted it to do.
I need to wash it every day to make something of it, so I guess it was my hair.

6. Do you have a memorable "ripped clothing" moment in your life? No? How about in someone else's?

You mean I standing there like Eve and someone walking in?
No.

7. What's changed on your blog since its inception? ...a redo? ...a change of pace? ...or is it about the same?

I used to change the look of my blog every two or three weeks.
I don't have the time anymore .

8. If you could travel back in time and whisper something to yourself ten years ago, what would it be?

I would tell myself that I'm good the way I am.

9. Okay, let's have it! What's the craziest, most impulsive thing you've ever done?

Telling the director of a play that I'm perfectly willing to play a boy's role if the female ones were given away.
Yep.
Consider it was the time that we mainly had boys' schools and girls' schools. After two schools merging I was the second girl to enter a boys' school.
Yep. They had plenty of boys to play the boys roles.

Oh my dear I felt so stupid that I turned around and said with grace: "You know where to reach me", walked two or three steps with my head high like a diva, and then ran the stairs and went straight home. LOL!
It took me quite some time to get over the stupidity. Months. Many months. Haha!!


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