Wednesday, May 6, 2009

Change of stresslevel: crashed

may 6 2009

After we came home from his social worker, my autistic son needed to release all the energy that accumulated before.

Leaving the house and going somewhere is difficult for him.
He wants to live up so much to what other people expect, that his stresslevels rise very high.
The rest of the day he was walking through the house..upstairs...downstairs.
And even though we could see he was happy with the outcome of the visit, he kept complaining.

His way of releasing his energy, but it drives us nuts.
I can ignore a lot, but the negativity of constant complaining touches us, each day again.

Yesterday and today, however, we saw him feeling OK.
He even took his own meds without me needing to tell him, made me a cup of coffee, and sat down with the girls to have a chat with them about how their day at school had been.

That the social worker took over contacting the council representative about our plans for his future, was a huge relief.

I think that's the reason why I couldn't sleep last night. (Well,... one hour.)
We're so used to the constant pressure of dealing with people who know things better.
It's like we're used to sleep in full armour in case we're suddenly faced with yet another fight.

Let's say I enjoyed the birds waking up and singing their songs.
Some still sing the abundant springsong, filling the gardens, with silences in which a lovely lady can be heard from far away.

During dinner I was soooooo tired.
And after dinner I just crashed.
I had to lie down on the couch and I slept so deep, like someone was holding my head in another dimension.
Waking up was like a last part of a crashtest.
Everything ached. Ugh.

Well, I might come down with something, or it's just the first step to a less stressful life. (OK, I love fooling myself by telling me that life will be better tomorrow. I know it might take a bit longer. LOL!)

Completed three forms and had them in the mail today.
  • forms for the neurological exam of son 3
  • forms for both girls for school
  • forms for the participation in a research project which tries to find the genes of autism.
    Well, with 8 of us, they'll have a good time. LOL!


I saw a nice cardigan at MS. Short sleeves, a very nice grey, wide.
But the recession... the recession.....
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