Thursday, November 6, 2008

Photographer of movement, a future.

november 6 2008

Today is a very important day for my second son.

His form of autism is diagnosed as PDD-NOS, but I have my doubts if this is the correct diagnosis. But who cares?

His social insight is that of approximately a 7 year old.
He is not able to put most of his feelings into words, his interests are very limited.

Right now he's 19, very, very handsome.
I've taught him to look people in the eyes when talking.
He's very intelligent and he has developed a good skill of observation.

Cameraman he wants to become.
Photographer of movement.

He has taught himself a lot of skills and he did well.
Musicgroups have discovered him to record them on stage and make a videoclip out of it.

It's all he can do.

He's afraid of schoolbuildings, afraid to do things he assumes he can't.

Today we're having an appointment at the council.

Our society wants everybody to work, and even though we're still searching for the right place for him to learn to become a cameraman, and to prepare him to go to a sort of school, it is brutaly cut off.

A few weeks ago we heard he'll get an income.
A small one, for disabled young people.
But he needs to be too stupid to work and have occupational therapy, or he needs to work.

I went the same way with my oldest who's got Asperger Syndrome and ADD.
That was a few years ago, and he got the chance for more education at a special school for the disabled.

But laws have changed, I was told on the phone by the same nice guy.
Even disabled people have to work, even now more normal people loose their jobs.
No work, no income.

I'm glad my son is supported in his fight to find a place in society with a knowledgeable woman, a social worker, who cares about him and who knows the ins and outs of this part of law and practice.

She'll be waiting this afternoon in front of the tall building where he doesn't feel comfortable and where someone takes a decision over his life without even knowing him well enough to make the right decision.

I feel so stressed that I've got a headache, but I can't show it at all, because my son can't handle stress well.

Just a few hours of now a future of a vulnerable person, who needs far more time to find his place in society, is changed from one moment to another.

In my head I'm preparing myself for his reactions, so I can stay calm and composed, and guide him through it all, hoping he won't feel cornered so much he'll get angry.

He can't take much stress and anger is his only way of expressing it.

Some days in life are better erased.

Let's hope all goes well.


  1. Best wishes to your talented son.

    I know all about Asperger's and Autism, it's all over our family tree.

    My older son has AI label at school, but has never been formally diagnosed with Asperger's, he's one of those kids who just doesn't 'fit' neatly into any diagnosis, but then again, many are like that.

    I worry already for his future. He will be 14 soon. I can't wait for him to graduate school, but then again, I wonder what he does then?

    Not easy.

    Take care,

  2. I feel for you. I too have a son with special needs, he has Cerebral palsy and is weelchair bound. he is 35 years old and now lives in a group home with 2 other guys. He has a day care worker who takes him out in the Community and odes the things that he likes.

    Over the years , I have worked very hard with him and fro him to help him reach his potential and get the propper care.

    I wish you the best.

  3. Thanks for sharing! I have 2 girls on the spectrum, ages 7 and 2. I have no idea what to expect when they are your children's ages. Not given it too much thought yet! Just taking it one day at a time. That seems to be my mantra!


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