Sunday, June 22, 2008

a dream about a friend

june 22 2008


I was in my house or appartment. Sleeping.
The doorbell kept on ringing, but I could hardly get awake, let alone step out of my bed and open the door.
I was wearing a nightgown, so i didn't bother much to try and open the door.
But I took the effort to peek down from the stairs and see who was at the door.

It was my youthfriend/pseudobrother, looking nice and relaxed, and young.
He was writing a letter on a paper on his leg, I think, and was about ready to put it in the box.

I started to run down to open the door, but halfway the stairs I woke up.

---

My friend was a seeker.

He was always able to put himself first, which ofcourse has learned me to put yself second without loosing the ability to put myself right in front of the crowd and enjoy it.

We didn't see each other for 15 years. Then we met again.

Our relationship was about the same.
Untill I started to criticise him about his attitude towards the education and wellbeing of his son.

He threw me out of his life.
I put up a verbal fight, but he just threw me out.

Later we met again at the schoolreunion.
I was happy to see him, and expected him to leave things in the past and see how we would get along again.

He just told me to back off and stay away from him.

That he wasn't able after all those years to see things in perspective really hurt me.
I guess I've been the only woman in his life standing up for his son, otherwise he would have thanked me.

In he dream he appeared how he looked when he was young, but but a bit less slim.
His hair was as shiny blonde as never before.
He radiated the feelings he spread when he was happy and relaxed.

Like the better part of him showed itself to me.

The dream is both good and sad.
It was a nice surprise to see him appear again,
but I now miss him even more.



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1 comment:

  1. Sad, if you ask me. I have dreams like this, well... not exactly. I don't wear night gowns :-P

    It's hard to see someone after years of nothing...

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